Reflecting on the summer holidays with Daisy Doo*

Reflecting on the summer holidays with Daisy Doo*

Hi all,

Our children and young people have returned to school and the Autumn term has begun. The first couple of weeks back for Julian* have been very successful. He has transitioned to a new class and a new school. He is in the same setting but a new school with new classmates and teachers. The first day of his return for me was an anxious one, I was mindful of one of my favourite sayings ‘what if’...

What if he didn’t like his class? What if he didn’t like his new teacher, what if... what if ... what if? 

I have used this phrase throughout my fostering career.  What if you miss the bus? What if you lose your phone? And so on and so on. I always try to have a scenario as an answer or a contingency plan for that 'what if'. 

We have recently been on holiday, well I say holiday, it was just a night in France.  Before we left, hubby and I had the conversation, 'what if he can’t handle the holiday', bearing in mind he is very well travelled.

Julian* has been struggling with a few things and has sensory issues that are now impacting his life, so our answer to that 'what if' was ‘we can just drive home’. This was exactly what we did.

This was why I was a little anxious on his first day back to school and am very mindful that not only does he have additional needs, but he has also experienced developmental trauma and has had adverse childhood experiences. (Calon Cymru delivers training on both of these subjects.)

A foster carer has to be so many things to the children we look after, but the most important thing is a ‘safe place’.  They need a little more reassurance, stability, boundaries and routine when they come to live with us. 

Julian needed to be in his ‘safe place’ whilst processing puberty, a new school, a new class, sensory issues and so on.  So ‘what if’ was easily answered and all was good again. 

We will continue to take him on holiday, at his pace, with loads of reassurance and some work on his sensory issues.

Happy Autumn days ahead with lots going on, enjoy.

Take care,

Daisy Doo* and Julian* too xx

*Name changed to protect the identity of the foster carer, children and young people in their care